Theory of Mind/Auditory Processing

Most people with autism have difficulties with what's called Theory of Mind. While your daughter may know how she feels in her own mind, she may have no idea that other people don't share her same thoughts and feelings and are even unaware of what's in your daughter's mind. You can read more of Theory of Mind and it's implications at sites like these:

http://www.iidc.indiana.edu/irca/education/TheoryofMind.html

http://www.autism.org/mind.html

I wrote a previous article on this topic at the web address below. The boy this refers to is a little older than your daughter but Theory of Mind and its implications is discussed in more detail. You can read it at:

http://en.allexperts.com/q/Autism-1010/Autism-37.htm

Apart from Theory of Mind, auditory processing is another problematic area for many people with autism. While your child's hearing may be just fine, she may have difficulty concentrating on what is said to her, making sense of what she hears and then knowing how to act on what you've said.

Most of us as adults are talkers. We try to reason with our children and the more their behavior bothers us, the more we tend to "talk at them". While this strategy may be fine for many kids, children with auditory processing weaknesses can be made more confused and frustrated by our talking. This is particularly true in emotionally charged situations. At such times it's better to keep your speaking to a minimum.

Instead, try using picture or signs or gestures. Just as many kids with autism have weak auditory processing skills, many are stronger visually. So, use this strength. While it may not be your natural way of doing things, if it makes messages clearer for your daughter, what have you got to lose?

You can find information on using visuals at www.do2learn.com. You'll be amazed what a difference it can make to incorporate visual schedules into your daughter's life both at home and at school.

Along with visual schedules, social stories are another tactic that can yield big dividends for the amount of effort you put in. A social story will show (in words and/or pictures) just what you want your child to do.

You can read some more about sensory issues and examples of how you can help at these sites:

http://www.autismsite.ca/html/hands_in_pants.html

http://www.autismsite.ca/html/hits_others.html

http://www.autismsite.ca/html/gym_and_music.html

http://www.autismsite.ca/html/frustrated.html

When sensory issues influence behaviour, social stories cna be an effective tool. Read more about them and see some examples:

http://www.autismnetwork.org/modules/social/sstory/index.html

http://www.polyxo.com/socialstories/

http://www.autisminspiration.com/public/dltemp/25AI1134.pdf

http://www.thegraycenter.org/

http://www.adders.org/socialstories.htm

http://autism.about.com/od/treatmentoptions/l/angry.pdf?nl=1

http://autism.healingthresholds.com/therapy/social-stories#rowe

While social stories are great tools, it can look daunting if you think you must write a social story for every situation imaginable. Don't worry. Start small. Over time you may have a whole collection of them that you keep in a binder. You and your little girl can read through them often or refer to them when similar situations arise. But for now, pick a couple key areas in which to concentrate.

Raising a child with autism requires detective work on your part. Fortunately there are people and tools to help you. You've made a great start with the teachers - they have observed and come up with possible reasons as to why your child is shoving others.

So, if it seems that she always pushes when she's standing in line, have her stand at the back of the line where she can keep everyone else in sight and feel safe from any possible pushing. Or if not knowing where the group is headed causes her anxiety, she could be first in the line.

If uncertainly over what comes next in her day contributes to the behaviors, using a visual schedule can help, possible accompanied by a verbal explanation if this assists her.

If others coming too close causes her to hit out, the whole class could work on personal space. They could all practice standing at arms length from each other. At circle time, your child could sit at the edge of the group or the back where she can see that others will not come too close. She (and others) could sit on carpet squares or masking tape marks so that they are spaced apart.

If she's touching to get the attention of other children, a social story can show her different ways of getting their attention. Role playing can help her hone these skills.

The other kids in the room can play a part in this. While we try to teach children in school to be kind, understand and accepting of each other, we also need to teach them when and how to be assertive. It's all right for the other children to say to your daughter, "No" or "Don't hit me" or "That hurts - no, don't hit". Even very young children can become effective role models and help decrease some of these undesirable behaviors.

Sharon A. Mitchell, B.A., B.Ed., M.A.
http://www.autismsite.ca/



http://en.allexperts.com/q/Autism-1010/Discipline-autism-4-year.htm